Breakups aren’t easy. It may take a bit of time to bounce back, but you will eventually. And the more you can do to take care of yourself at this time, the better.
Since we have entered into a new year, why not start fresh and make a few resolutions to help you get over your past relationship or prepare you for something that is part of most everyone’s maturing life.
To get you started, here are a few New Yea’s Resolutions to consider, in no particular order:
If you like sports, play them. If you don’t, get to a gym or organize daily walks with your friends. Physical activity is good for your mind, body and spirit. It also acts as a wonderful distraction.
2) Eat well
You may be the kind of person who reaches for the cake and cookies when you’re down. Or if you’re like me you do the opposite, you don’t eat enough. But either way isn’t healthy. So be aware of your eating habits during this time and make a decision to snack on healthy foods.
3) Commit to not asking
You may be tempted to ask your friends about what he is doing. Resist! You don’t need to know. Whatever you are told will only be part of the story anyway and that will get your mind racing, wanting more. Don’t waste one more second of your precious time thinking about the ended relationship.
4) Remove the evidence
This is a good time to do a bit of room and locker cleaning. By this I mean getting rid of stuff associated with your ex. For example: emails, texts, photos, phone messages, social media connections and that random hoodie or piece of clothing he lent you. The less visual reminders the better. You decide what needs to go.
5) Get yourself a grief team
By grief team I mean several individuals who have your best interest and well being at heart, such as your Quince court. Perhaps your mother, sister or aunt, make the cut as well. You could add a guidance counselor or another supportive adult, like a friend’s mother, to the mix. Choose people who can help lift your spirits and self-confidence. I like to have seven people on my grief team. That way I have a different person to speak with every day of the week. You may not want to be this structured but spreading your heartache around amongst your team will give you an opportunity to talk about your feelings as much as you need without wearing them out.
Overall, be good to yourself all the time and know that you are worthy of happiness. Most importantly, understand that being happy is a choice and that only you have the power to choose it. What other positive New Year’s resolutions will you make to help you move on with a smile on your face?
Note from Quinceanera.com: Caird Urquhart is a published author and founder and president of New Road Coaching, a coaching firm designed to provide intensive one-on-one personal coaching services. She is dedicated to improving the way human beings work, play, love and live, and for 2012 will serve as a contributing writer for Quinceanera.com where she will pass on her “anything is possible” philosophy to encourage Quinceañeras to look beyond their perceived reality to the great possibilities of their lives. Her book “30 Ways to Better Days: How to Rally After You’ve Been Dumped” is available on Amazon.com and at www.newroadcoaching.com. Welcome Caird!