Tips for Talking to Your Son/Daughter about Sex

Starting conversations about life topics can be difficult for some parents because they did not grow up in an environment where these topics were discussed among family members. Some parents may be afraid to think that they do not have the right answers or feel confused by the amount of information available.

Here are 10 tips from the experts at Advocates for Youth (www.advocatesforyouth.org) for talking to your child about sex:

1. 1. First, ensure the conversation with your child by giving them the confidence to talk to you about any topic.
2. 2. Take advantage of teachable moments. A friend's pregnancy, a news article, or a television program can help start a conversation.
3. 3. Listen more and speak less. Think about what is being asked. Confirm with your child that what you heard is indeed what your child wants to ask you.
4. 4. Do not rush and jump to conclusions. The fact that a young person wants to talk about sex does not mean that they are having or thinking about sex.
5. 5. Answer questions in a simple and direct manner. Give accurate, honest, short, and simple answers.
6. 6. Respect your child's opinions. Share your thoughts, beliefs, and values and help your child express themselves as well.
7. 7. Reassure young people that they are normal, just like their questions and thoughts.
8. 8. Teach your children ways to make good decisions related to sex and show them how to get out of risky and dangerous situations.
9. 9. Admit when you do not have the right answer. Suggest that both of you find the correct answer on the internet or in a library.
10. 10. Discuss that sometimes your daughter/son may feel more comfortable talking to someone other than you. Together, think of other trusted adults they can talk to. Your healthcare provider can also be a supportive resource. Our clinic, Westside Family Health Center, provides educational sexual health services.

Adolescents also have access to free or low-cost reproductive health services.